From doubt to trust

Intimate relationships are wonderful except when they're not. Most of us experience several relationships in our lifetime which means we go through several breakups too. Each breakup is unique but they all share one thing—they tend to be hard, even the ones we choose.

Sometimes after a breakup, we begin to doubt ourselves, our worth and our lovability. We may wonder if we can trust ourselves and our feelings. Depending on the situation, we might lose confidence too.

While it's useful to own how our thoughts, words and actions impact our relationships, it's not useful to beat ourselves up for the places we might do better. Upon reflection there are often things we did that we wish we hadn't or things we didn't do that we wish we had. Nobody gets everything right at all times, especially in relationships. It's impossible because relationships ask us to review ourselves and challenge us to grow.

All we can do is our best in any given moment so doing our best in each moment is enough. Our best changes as we change and in relation to many things inside and around of us, like how tired we are, our stress level and how safe we feel, to name a few. It evolves with us too. As we grow, so grows our best.

Since we rely on self-trust to rebuild our lives after a breakup, how do we restore it?

To move our lives forward with greater integrity after a breakup we need to rebuild authentic self-trust. Instead of inadvertently repeating what hurts in future relationships, with a little guidance we can use our past to heal and grow on a subtle, core level. There's an entire module to address this in After A Breakup HELP with simple practices that are easy to do yet give powerful results. Sometimes all it takes is a new approach to have that breakthrough we've been praying for.