How to move past resistance and meditate

We know meditation is good for us, so why don't we do it? If we're not interested in meditating, that's one thing. But when we are interested and still resist, why? What stops us?

Here are the four most common excuses we use to not meditate, why they don't hold up and how to move past them.

I've tried it. Meditation doesn't work for me. This excuse is an easy cop-out. It's like a decree that lets us off the hook without a real reason, because meditation does work for all of us. Reaching an easier place with it involves a process of reconditioning the mind and body.

Like anything new we learn, meditating with ease takes practice. We don't drive, dance, read, cook, play sports or anything else with ease until we've done it enough times to gain some mastery over our discomfort while conditioning ourselves to the basics. Finding our comfort zone with new things takes practice. We must do them enough times to get a good feel for them, witness the dynamics of our resistance, and begin to build a relationship with whatever it is.

There are several styles of meditation such as contemplative, focused attention, mindfulness, visualization, moving, sound and holistic or kundalini. If you don't resonate with one style, try another. Give each one a bona fide trial. This means do a specific meditation at least three times before ditching it, or stay with a certain meditation style for a few months before deciding it's not for you.

I don't like it. I can't sit still. Most of us live with overstimulated, frazzled nervous systems. That's the whole point!

The human body isn't designed to operate in the ongoing state of hyperdrive produced by our modern culture. We have easy access to plenty of stimuli to keep our nerves activated 24/7. And we are conditioned to distract ourselves from anything that makes us uncomfortable.

An overstimulated nervous system makes it hard to sit still. When the body holds stress energy, it tries to release it through movement or ignore it through distraction. Fidgeting, rocking, tapping fingers or kicking legs are all signs of a frazzled nervous system. Scrolling social media and streaming online are nervous system distractions. But we don't have to sit still to meditate.

There are moving meditations like Tai Chi, Qigong, labyrinth walks and kundalini meditative kriyas that help tame stress energy in the mind and body. If you have too much nervous energy to sit still, try starting with a moving meditation practice. It may be just the ticket you're looking for.

I don't have time. I'm too busy. It's easy to point to all the busyness in our lives and say "I don't have time." Most of us can find a few minutes in a day to nourish ourselves, and if we can't, it's a good idea to re-evaluate things.

Usually a lack of time is not the obstacle. It's how we use the time we have. Or it can also be a belief that we need more time to meditate than we have.

Review how you fill your free time. How many minutes or hours a day do you spend online scrolling, playing games or watching entertaining (distracting) content? I bet it's enough for you to carve off a few minutes for meditation.

Meditating doesn't have to take a long time. In the kundalini tradition, for example, three minutes is all you need to do a potent meditative kriya. The key is regularity, not time.

My mind is too busy. I can't quiet my thoughts. This is actually true for most of us, especially as beginning meditators. Remove all the distractions, sit in quiet stillness and watch the mind activate.

Many believe that the goal of meditating is to quiet the mind but this is incorrect. Our mind runs endless thought streams that grab our attention all day long. Science says we are subjected to 50,000 to 80,000 thoughts in a single day. The yogis say we have 1000 thoughts with every wink of the eye! It's not realistic to believe we can silence the mind for any length of time, and silencing it is not the goal.

Meditation helps us master the mind, not quiet it. This means we gain the skill and energy needed to focus our attention where we want it to go instead of being pulled into the mind's endless narratives. Some meditation styles with this intent include contemplative, focused attention, and kundalini meditations.

Final Thoughts

In over 25 years of practicing and teaching kundalini yoga and meditation, I've heard all kinds of excuses either from myself or someone else. But these excuses are nothing more than resistance rising. When we look deeply enough, our excuses don't actually hold up.

It's easy to recognize ourselves in these excuses. Humans are pros at avoiding things that challenge the ego or make us uncomfortable. Plus we are socially and culturally conditioned to follow norms, believing that by doing so we increase our chances of fitting in and being safe.

But many of us are tired, worn out by the weight of today's social and cultural chaos. We feel an inner pull to something deeper and more true. We long for harmony and peace under the pain of disharmony and conflict. The more of us who open to this inner awareness, the greater our chances of creating the kind of world where life of every kind can flourish.

Meditation provides us a gateway into that world. This is your invitation to set excuses and resistance aside to give meditation a dedicated try. Find a style that resonates with you and start because wherever you start, the practice will take you exactly where your soul is ready to go. If you're not sure where to start, try a holistic style like kundalini meditation to cover all the bases.